I think of myself as sophisticated. Cosmopolitan. Far from a fool. But sadly, I’m not. I fall for all the traps. I used to look at all the bottom feeders of the acting world, schools for learning how to make commercials, acting classes, etc., that cost a fortune. And try and navigate around them for my kids with just a little success. Because the dream propels you forward. The dream takes over and the mysterious path to fulfillment of that dream is a snake pit of mistakes that lead nowhere but empty pockets. I thought I knew that.
But here I sit, trying to create buzz about Walking with Elephants. Trying to find the map to show me the way. And it propels me to do stupid things. The stupidest thing I did of late is fork over $149 dollars to Publisher’s Weekly Select. You see, in order to be considered for that cherished review by PW as an indie, in order to have the chance that fortune will kick the doors down of your locked-up world of ordinariness, YOU NEED THAT REVIEW. Or at least I thought so. But here’s the catch. In order to be selected for a review you first have to be listed in their online piece of crap called PW Select. A very poorly designed online magazine. And here it is–to be listed costs–right that $149. So I did it. Sent in my book. Got a confirmation that they had it. And waited and hoped. Out of the 184 books listed for this issue, 25 were selected. How are they chosen–who the heck knows? What did I get? A mention in the giant list. No links, no cover photo, no reviews–no nothing. Just the name of the book and a one-line pitch.
And there are other sharks out there that charge a fortune for ads, Kindle News Daily, Book Daily among others and others that charge a fortune for virtual book tours, like Pump up Your Book. And Kirkus reviews? $400 and you run the chance of being killed by a bad review THAT YOU PAID A FORTUNE FOR!!! All feeding off the hopes and dreams of an indie author, such as myself, that they’re the way to kick start phenomenal sales. I also don’t recommend Librarything giveaways in exchange for reviews. People take the free book, but don’t write the review. So even though it doesn’t cost much, it’s another scam.
Everything seemed right for my book to get going. Great stack of reviews that I keep pushing to get but hope will just appear organically from people who aren’t asked to write one. Postings in blogs. Awards starting to come in. But guess what? The road to phenomenal sales is still a mystery. Spending money on these ads and whatnots is doing zilch. It is what it is. My subject is timely. In fact, The Week magazine just had an article about the difficulty women face today trying to juggle work and family. It is well-written, real, and also funny. So go figure. My main character is not a vampire, a sex slave, or a warrior. Maybe the book is too real. I don’t know. Finishing this book and getting it published was a dream fulfilled. The other dreams are just greedy, thumb sucking dreams. The kind the sharks feed on. So I have to learn from these mistakes and just be a writer. I hope I won’t make these mistakes with my next book.
I hope.
One can only hope.